Giving birth for the first time is such an exhilarating experience and because of its complexity is almost impossible to describe. To explain all the emotion, all the magic in its entirety using mere words hardly even allows me to touch the surface of this experience. In my life, I have yet to come across any other event that has so overwhelmed my being with both exhaustion and tranquility. And to get to experience this with your soul mate? The one you have promised forever to? Well, that is just a present all its own.
A child that has been growing in you the last 9 months is now going to pass through your body and take her first breath. Through this miracle you somehow see the reflection of yourself as well as your spouse simultaneously as you look into the eyes of your new baby. Perfect fingers... perfect toes... You go from having felt completely vulnerable as you have just experienced nature taking its course in a whirlwind of intense moments - of which you had absolutely no control over!- to holding a miracle in the form of your baby in your arms. You lay entangled in a web of emotion that contains both exhaustion, happiness, relief, serenity and complete, utter joy. You realize that you have been given a precious gift. A gift that will teach you patience, compassion, kindness, and love throughout your entire life. Love...that four letter word. How is it possible that you can instantly love this little being upon meeting her? How is it possible that you can know in your heart that you would do anything to protect her? There is a universal understanding between a mother and child that is spoken in every language by just looking into the eyes. Those beautiful, little eyes. An understanding of trust and love. Love...that powerful, wonderful word...
Realizing that you are not solely engaging in this miracle alone, you see that your lover is feeling this fusillade of emotion as well. The miracle of birth has the power to create a tenderness in the brawniest of men and masculinity is easily softened by this miracle expressed by a tear, a smile, a hand squeeze. Seeing this side of a man, that has now become a father, can only deepen a woman's love for him. To see such a tiny creature held in such big arms is one of nature’s most precious contrasts. To see your husband fall in love with this child, the child you two alone with God created, is a benevolence all its own and a moment neither of you will forget. You are now a little family and that can never be reversed. Father, mother, child.
Even now as I try to explain how it feels to be a part of the miracle, I find myself coming up short, blabbing on about emotions and memories I can feel, but cannot express. I struggle to understand and comprehend the full magnitude of the memory myself, let alone convey what it means to me. How can I really put into words an event that leaves me speechless and in awe? Even having just experienced it again, I don’t think I can truly explain what it is like to give birth. Perhaps the only true advocate for this miracle is experience itself.
When I discover someone I love will be expecting their first child, I can’t help but find myself once again overcome with excitement. I know that they will find themselves awed by both the intensity and surrealness of it all and I can’t help but relive the memory for myself, just to be reminded of the miraculousness. Those of you who have had the honor of being a part of the miracle, you know what I am talking about. And for those of you who are yet to experience it, hold on, you are in for the most precious ride of your life.